Secondary schoolmates

Last week, I was invited to a small gathering with my secondary schoolmates in an overpriced Japanese Restaurant call Shinkushiya. It wasn't particularly outstanding in any way apart from the figure next to the picture of the food in the menu. Pricey.

Moreover, not just the price, the location of the restaurant could be consider rather far too, it is about 45 minutes away from my place. Door to door would probably take me about an hour.

However, having said that, the opportunity to hang out with my secondary schoolmates would probably be ....Priceless. The opportunity of gathering with a bunch of schoolmates in foreign land is definitely worth all the effort, money and time.

The good thing about sitting together dear secondary schoolmates is that we all speak the same language effortlessly. The idea of sharing stories and jokes in our language which has strong hakka ascent, filling a classy Japanese restaurant is mind-boggling.

From the state of just being together with a bunch of secondary friends, I just realised how mistrust I have become, or should i say, comfortable with suspicion. I would put mask on, hardened my shell to protect myself like a crab. Not only that, with my strong claws, I suspect, I have had hurt someone over the table.

When I was young, I would talk about anything, more open to ideas, people and situation. Like a soft-shell crab. At least, I know I could care-less, do and say whatever I want, waste time, or maybe fall in love with snails. Most importantly, I was generous with trust, time, knowledge (if i had some) and love. Perhaps it is the experience of university, or being abroad, or quite simply growing old over the small handful of past years. I have lost the ability to speak without thinking or speak nothing with a positive gesture.
I somehow become more careful with words, thoughts and body languages. Which I think are essential to survive in a harsh conditions like reality. I cannot afford to be generous any more.

But that particular night, I am not sure if I am wearing a mask or plainly being careful with what I say and do. I have had a weird feelings that I am over- reacting to people whom I was so comfortable with when I was in secondary schools. Although we generally looked more mature, we are somehow still "us". How we used to scream, hate, care, cry, love and be real with each other. I am very impressed we all can get along by being so honest, real and harsh on each other. :)

"Dear readers, although I am now looking forward to our next catch up session with "us", but at the same time, fear that these excitements are just temporary. like a tipping point. "